What are your deal makers, or indeed your deal breakers, when it comes to a relationship? What are the things that instantly let you know that you could never date this guy? And is there anything that a guy does that makes you attracted to him regardless of the rest of his perceived flaws?
For me the deal breakers are the easy ones to define...
if he has bad teeth or poor breath
if he is unkind to animals
if he disrespects his immediate family
if he suffers from an addiction
if he is stingy with money
These traits in a guy would make me wary about dating him in the long term. Some are a little selfish but I do not apologise for having them on my list. Unkindness to a helpless animal, to me, shows a possibility of being a poor father. I have enough trouble keeping my own life straight and I really don't have the mental or emotional ability to rehabilitate a recovering addict. A persons teeth always let me know how well they take care of themselves. I'm not dissing crooked teeth - my own aren't the straightest - but they have to clean and taken care of. I don't need a guy to spend a ton of money on me, and I definitely don't look to date rich guys but a man who insists on going 'dutch' for every date and imposes a budget on Christmas presents just screams 'tightwad' to me.
The deal maker is a much harder one to pin point. I ran through a number of different deal makers in my head but each of them were only applicable in some instances.
For me... I have to be the most important thing in my man's life. I have to be a princess in his eyes. Importance is something that isn't immediately apparent when you start dating a guy. It's something that is realised over a period of time through words and gestures. He also has to have an amazing smile and smell great. A great natural smell is really important to me.
How this can be turned into a single deal maker.... beyond my knowledge.
For me the deal breakers are the easy ones to define...
if he has bad teeth or poor breath
if he is unkind to animals
if he disrespects his immediate family
if he suffers from an addiction
if he is stingy with money
These traits in a guy would make me wary about dating him in the long term. Some are a little selfish but I do not apologise for having them on my list. Unkindness to a helpless animal, to me, shows a possibility of being a poor father. I have enough trouble keeping my own life straight and I really don't have the mental or emotional ability to rehabilitate a recovering addict. A persons teeth always let me know how well they take care of themselves. I'm not dissing crooked teeth - my own aren't the straightest - but they have to clean and taken care of. I don't need a guy to spend a ton of money on me, and I definitely don't look to date rich guys but a man who insists on going 'dutch' for every date and imposes a budget on Christmas presents just screams 'tightwad' to me.
The deal maker is a much harder one to pin point. I ran through a number of different deal makers in my head but each of them were only applicable in some instances.
For me... I have to be the most important thing in my man's life. I have to be a princess in his eyes. Importance is something that isn't immediately apparent when you start dating a guy. It's something that is realised over a period of time through words and gestures. He also has to have an amazing smile and smell great. A great natural smell is really important to me.
How this can be turned into a single deal maker.... beyond my knowledge.
What are your deal breakers and makers? What turns off a guy instantly? And what wins your heart?
Very interesting one this! i agree completely with your deal breakers. I would also add to this:
ReplyDeleteWasters. Guys with no ambition to better themselves or at the very least not have some goals for themselves that they are actively pursuing. I seem to attract this particular breed.
A guy that is secure in himself and who he is is essential. This I know comes with age alot of the time which is why I think some girls find older guys more attractive. That is why I do anyways. If someone is happy with who they are as a person then they can make someone else happy.
Its also important for a guy to include me in his future when hes making plans etc. All these plans do not have to include me but when making serious decisions/choices he should definitely be serious as to how they will affect me.
Also (and this goes both ways) he has to show his appreciation for me. This does not require grand gestures but it is important to make someone feel important and special.
I definitely believe that real love finds you when you are not even looking for it. I dont believe in the concept of 'boyfriend shopping' and settling, or saying 'i love you' just because you feel pressured will only end one way. Real love comes into your life when you least expect it and sometimes you might not even realise its happening.
Is it weird that I like crooked teeth? Bad breath is a no no obviously, but I think a bit of crookedness adds character. It's so sad that all American actors have the same teeth whereas British actors have a bit more realism to them.
ReplyDeleteThink of David Bowie before and after he got his teeth done, he looked way better before!